Отправлено: 09.07.10 23:13. Заголовок: [set youself free]

 Отправлено: 10.08.10 02:16. Заголовок: “Take care of yourse..

“Take care of yourself.”
Oliver put her letter aside again. Pathetic silly smile appeared on his tired face. He was not capable to hide these feeling any more. Anxiety. Loneliness. Emptiness. He was enormously desperate and still shocked. She took his money and escaped from the scene of Oliver’s reality. Alex ruined his life, his plans, his love…
Oliver took the letter again into his hands and read it thoroughly. From cover to cover. Oliver could no longer recognize himself in his own existence. This letter drove him to look further afield. It became transformed in a special every day ritual – reading these awkward postscript and a new attempt to forgive her. Alex stopped their affair so suddenly so he couldn’t understand a reason even more.
“I would have liked so badly things to have turned out differently.”
If I had even known that “things might turn this way ”, I would have never felt this all-absorbing anxiety inside. I would have never had propose you either. Surprisingly, I never blamed you later in our brake up. I perceived guilty myself.
I put my evening outfit – black foppish suit and perfect tie. I swore never get in a trap of women charm and always stay independent. “Take care of yourself” – be totally sure, I will.
Expensive perfume and pleasant appearance. Nice handkerchief and goof cigars. I used to smoke some years ago, when I was writing my doctoral thesis. But I decided to quite. Now I had to other way to salve my own conscience, than inhaling one cigar and the same time taking another.
“The day we stopped being lovers you would no longer be able to envisage seeing me.”
I set my tie straight and passed the building off. I wanted to leave my apartment as soon as it was possible.
I’ll leave you here,- I whispered, hiding in a crowed.